If the bar is too high, you can lower it.
>> bar(flip(sort(rand(1,2))))
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Matlab jokes or puns
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Are there any good Matlab jokes? I don't mean why or any other Easter eggs, I mean good jokes involving Matlab. Actually, that bar may be a bit too high. Any jokes, good or bad, let's hear 'em.
208 件のコメント
Alberto Uriel
2016 年 9 月 1 日
Q: Why did the 30-60-90 triangle marry the 45-45-90 triangle? A: They were right for each other
Ahmad Hably
2016 年 9 月 1 日
She >> You don't love me anymore...
Engineer >> What, What are you saying... why?
She >> Tell me then.. Who is that "matlab" that you mentioned while you're sleeping ...
She >> No, "Matlab", she is my assistant in work. In addition, she is married to "Simulink" since 1984.
Engineer's Wife >> ok
Sean Doyle
2016 年 9 月 1 日
There are 10 types of people in the world, those who understand binary and those who don't.
Corey Reuter
2016 年 9 月 1 日
What do organic mathematicians throw into their fireplaces? Natural Logs.
Emerson Batista
2016 年 9 月 1 日
"The order of the tractors do not change the viaduct", the same as the order of the factors does not alter the product.
William Grefe
2016 年 9 月 1 日
Why is a math book always unhappy?
Because it always has lots of problems.
emil axell
2016 年 9 月 1 日
Why do you use matlab to create plots and graphs? Because its so easy to implement in my Latex documents.
Said no social studies student ever
Siddharth Kumar
2016 年 9 月 1 日
Joey: What are up to these days brah?
Chandler: Nothing much bruh, Just busy with my labs.
Joey: Oh, I'm also quite busy with my lab.
chandler: But bro, you don't have any labs this semester.
Joey: I have bro, MAT_LAB!
*Joey will be Joey*
Jon
2016 年 9 月 1 日
There needs to be a matlab script that can calculate what the color of nine (9) smells like
Tomás
2016 年 9 月 1 日
How many simulationists does it take to replace a lightbulb? Infinity: Each one builds a fully validated model, but the light actually never goes on.
Suleman
2016 年 9 月 1 日
She >> You don't love me anymore... Engineer >> What, What are you saying... why? She >> Tell me then.. Who is that "matlab" that you mentioned while you're sleeping ... She >> No, "Matlab", she is my assistant in work. In addition, she is married to "Simulink" since 1984. Engineer's Wife >> ok my favorite
Fasih ur Rehman
2016 年 9 月 1 日
In our Local Language here in Pakistan when we write MATLAB during chat conversations it is falsely interpreted by our friends. Because Matlab in Urdu means " meaning" . Its funny when People ask you if you did Matlab assignment when speaking Urdu.
Jose Alan Badillo Montes
2016 年 9 月 1 日
a fool walks into a bar, takes a look around and says "Hello world!" xD.
SURAJ
2016 年 9 月 1 日
Why a man always dream that his wish of MATLAB comes true ? Because according to him MATLAB also means * | | May all the Lakes are BEER||*.
Abedalsalam Bani-Ahmed
2016 年 9 月 1 日
What is the actual translation of Matlab in Arabic
A laboratory died!!! True story :)
Michael Jarboe
2016 年 9 月 1 日
way to make me crash my MatLab...
%LB Sim
sys = 'LB_Simulationist';
open_system(sys);
run(sys);
% Lightbulb == 1 (On) // == 0 OFF
Lightbulb = simout.data;
num_sims = 1;
while Lightbulb <= 0
run(sys);
Lightbulb = simout.data;
num_sims = num_sims + 1;
end
Patrick Delaney
2016 年 9 月 1 日
What do the wise sages use and search for during life? मतलब!
(please copy and paste that into Google translate and look at the English pronunciation and the Hindi translation)
003 003
2016 年 9 月 1 日
Everytime I transfer the type of an image, like
I = single(imread("one_image.jpg"));
I always repeat silently, 'single'. And there shall never be one image. So I repeat again and again.
John Ware
2016 年 9 月 1 日
"help" is a great feature in Matlab...and one day while looking for a function shortcut i found this gem.. and laughed
>> help fun
fun not found.
v.agrawal
2016 年 9 月 1 日
if you == have_a_little_time
disp('Great! You are reading my comment.')
elseif you == have_no_time
disp('Oh man! How you can be so busy?')
else
disp('There is lots of fun.')
end
StefanLSN
2016 年 9 月 1 日
Mathematics is made of 50 percent formulas, 50 percent proofs, and 50 percent imagination.
Rohan Patil
2016 年 9 月 1 日
Matlab is so possessive that it wont let Simulink interact with us without it!
Sascha Nicklisch
2016 年 9 月 1 日
What is the sign on the door of an internet hacker? 'Gone Phishing' :)
Sunny Desai
2016 年 9 月 1 日
Matlab could have been as cool as Batman if it had one LESS letter l and one New N!
Pedram MASOUDI
2016 年 9 月 1 日
V=[cos(pi/180*Min(j,D))*cos(pi/180*Min(j,Dip)) ...
sin(pi/180*Min(j,D))*cos(pi/180*Min(j,Dip)) ...
-sin(pi/180*Min(j,Dip))];)
Error: Unbalanced or unexpected parenthesis or bracket.
I found it: it is winking at the end of the code ;)
Elisa Sabbat
2016 年 9 月 1 日
Two coordinates are talking. What did one coordinate say to the other ?
"I do see your point"
Lynette Bustos
2016 年 9 月 2 日
>>social life
Undefined function or variable 'social'.
Did you mean:
>> scal life
Yes, sorry MatLab I did mean "scal life"...
Markus Hail
2016 年 9 月 2 日
How many programmers are needed to change a light bulb? NaN, it`s a hardwareproblem.
Matej Pacha
2016 年 9 月 2 日
A manager and a programmer are travelling by car for a business meeting. Suddenly, the car engine fails and the manager says: "what should we do now? Can you fix it?" "Sure, it's easy, I do it every time my PC fails - let's get off the car, wait for a while and then get in again!"
Sajib Kumar Chaudhury
2016 年 9 月 2 日
What will be the sum of "love" ?? How could be even "love" have
sum. But matlab knows...
sivaram b
2016 年 9 月 2 日
While function and Wife function are similar in nature. while(1) :loop will always be executed with out any break; wife(1) :wife gives only one option to listen to her which should be executed by husband with out any excuse
Emmet Sheerin
2016 年 9 月 2 日
Why do mathematicians always get Christmas and Halloween mixed up? Because Oct 31 = Dec 25
ganbayar batchuluun
2016 年 9 月 2 日
i dont know it could be a joke but anyway it is here: People tell me write code in C++ because matlab is slow and c++ is fastest, but matlab is faster when i test it using lot of GUI for real.
Firnas Ahamed
2016 年 9 月 2 日
wanna create an m-file which could make someone fall in love with me...What is the code for???Can any1 suggest:)
ALBERT ALEXANDER STONIER
2016 年 9 月 2 日
Fun overloaded programs will be updated as an extravagant stuff.
Gareth Thomas
2016 年 9 月 2 日
t = linspace(-pi,pi, 350);
X = t .* sin( pi * sin(t)./t);
Y = -abs(t) .* cos( pi * sin(t)./t);
plot(X,Y);
fill(X, Y, 'r');
set(gcf, 'Position', get(0,'Screensize'));
title('Happy Birthday!', 'FontSize', 28);
Marco
2016 年 9 月 6 日
Matlab is like some kind of a religion, if he doesn't know the answer then he send you a NaN (misspelling of Nun)
Bhuvnesh Rathor
2016 年 9 月 7 日
matlab is very intresting in simulation if we connect low value device to high capacity then matlab always answered
Rahat Ali Khan Langah
2016 年 9 月 10 日
I hop there will a fun toolbox in MATLAB. Set the parameters and keep laughing.
Mathan Chandran
2016 年 9 月 13 日
I don't like to see that matlab accepts subroutines on jokes and puns.
Larry Kyrala
2016 年 9 月 13 日
There once was a humble developer,
Who tried simulating a propellerer,
'When it tries to spin
The out flows in,'
But backwards his model ran betterer.
- Larry Kyrala (In response to a coworker asking how to write a clean limerick rhyming with 'developer'. 2009-02-20)
Jochen Schuettler
2016 年 9 月 14 日
K>> last_err
Undefined function or variable 'last_err'.
Did you mean:
K>> lasterr
ans =
Undefined function or variable 'last_err'.
Jacob
2016 年 9 月 14 日
Did you hear the one about the constipated mathematician? He worked it out with pencil and paper.
Joshua
2016 年 9 月 14 日
Did you ever hear the joke about the Matlab toolbox equivalent to a poor poet's handbook?....Yeah, me neither.
Alessandro Cesetti
2016 年 9 月 14 日
Have you ever heard about MATLAB toolbox that prepares you a coffee? Be sure to have MOKA port on your laptop!!!
pankaj mathur
2016 年 9 月 14 日
i am adjusted... i am showing off.. these lines not for me.. these are inbuilt code :D :D [(imadjust, imshow)]...
Devesh Kumar
2016 年 9 月 14 日
imagesc(get(gcf,'PointerShapeCData')); colormap([0 0 0 ; 1 1 .5]); axis image; axis off; set(gcf,'pointer','custom')
pankaj mathur
2016 年 9 月 14 日
i am adjusted... i am showing off.. these lines not for me.. these are inbuilt code :D :D [(imadjust, imshow)]...
Priyabrata Panigrahi
2016 年 9 月 14 日
I fell in love when i first MET-LAB. So i continued working in LAB as scientist...hehe ;)
pankaj mathur
2016 年 9 月 14 日
i am adjusted... i am showing off.. these lines not for me.. these are inbuilt code :D :D [(imadjust, imshow)]...
Shefali Ramteke
2016 年 9 月 14 日
seriously??? cool stuff dude! yeah this inbuilt code is indeed over the top! :P :D :D
Parvez Rafi
2016 年 9 月 14 日
To mathematicians, solutions mean finding the answers. But to chemists, solutions are things that are still all mixed up.
Juan Ant
2016 年 9 月 14 日
why a turtle is so slow ?? mmmm let me think... what are you exactly asking FOR ?? ... maybe no one is waiting FOR ... FOR example, with other animals ...
Kane Byles
2016 年 9 月 14 日
If I had a Labrador named Matt to follow me around, my life would be complete.
Sarah Norred
2016 年 9 月 14 日
A: "What is the integral of 1/cabin?"
B: "log cabin."
A: "Nope, houseboat--you forgot the C."
Eross Janos
2016 年 9 月 15 日
Helpdesk: Good day. How may I help you? Customer: Hello... I can't print. Helpdesk: Would you click on start for me and... Customer: Listen pal, don't start getting technical! I'm not Bill G...
Praneeth kumar
2016 年 9 月 15 日
want to know about matlab f... ! , it's stuck as usual. "help f..." suggest that f... is funny.
Benedictor Alexander Nguchu
2016 年 9 月 15 日
LastName = {'Smith';'Johnson';'Williams';'Jones';'Brown'};
Character = ['lazy1';'short';'urgly'; 'sleep';'talke'];
EyesFeature = ['sqaur';'recta';'brown';'Bluee';'spher'];
T = table(Character,EyesFeature,'RowNames',LastName);
>> T
T =
Character EyesFeature
_________ ___________ Smith lazy1 sqaur
Johnson short recta
Williams urgly brown
Jones sleep Bluee
Brown talke spher
